Tuesday, February 3, 2015

PROLOGUE THE BEGINNING A MODERN DAY PRINCESS FINDS HER PRINCE CHARMING (2ND installment)

PROLOGUE
THE BEGINNING
A MODERN DAY PRINCESS FINDS HER PRINCE CHARMING
(2ND installment)

Sometimes a story begins long before the characters are aware they are involved in a life-altering experience.  So it is with the story of Scruggs and Samantha. 
Long before they came into my life to alter its trajectory, events were happening around me foreshadowing the possibility of a sad end to my fairytale Cinderella marriage to my Prince Charming.  Maybe then, a short history of my Cinderella story will help you understand how life can get in the way of happy endings.
My Prince Charming came to me when I was in my late thirties, my children mostly raised and gone.  He came in the guise of a handsome criminal defense lawyer, and I was a prosecutor.
Like the plot of most love stories, we were separated by the demands of our professions. But, even though we came from opposite sides of the criminal justice system, the sparks flew between us.  We couldn’t help ourselves, though both of us were reticent at first to cross the professional lines of prosecutor and defense lawyer.
We were lucky; my fairy godmother came in the guise of a nosy supervisor who noticed the sparks between the prince and me whenever we met at the counsel table.  Had she not mentioned it to me, I never would have had the courage to cross the courtroom and ask him to lunch.
Once started, the trajectory of our love affair was virtually a straight line from our first date.  Within a year I joined his defense firm, and within a year after that we were married.  Our life was the perfect modern-day Cinderella and Prince Charming marriage.  Our love was conceived in respect, nurtured by trust, and cemented with communication.  With little or no effort I became the perfect New Millennium Cinderella with a successful marriage; a flourishing law practice; a home filled with animals and love; and, best of all, I had a perfect husband who asked only that I love him.
But life is not simple, even for Prince Charming and Cinderella.  There is a toll extracted with the passage of time.  Marriage partners grow and evolve, interests change, and emotional and physical challenges become like grit in a gearbox, all of it making it harder for the partners to balance the demands of their professional lives with their families and their own needs.  Sometimes things slip quietly away—no one even aware they are gone until it is too late.
Seventeen years into my perfect marriage and partnership, everything began to slip away as our lives began to spiral out of control.  I lost my way as a criminal defense lawyer, and my confidence was in tatters—the price paid for too many losses.  My prince’s strong body began fail, his spine destroyed from too many landings and take-offs from carriers during his reckless youth as a Navy fighter pilot.  Then, I lost too many who were close to me, leading me to shut out of my life the man I loved most—afraid I would lose him, too, if I loved him too much.  In return, I became invisible to my Prince Charming. 

It wasn’t his fault.  I shut him out, refusing to speak of the unbearable pain I was suffering.  Nothing had prepared me to face the horrible emotional and physical toll that was extracted during a time when so many were taken from me.  Talking about my pain only made it worse, so silence became my refuge.

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