Tuesday, March 17, 2015

CHAPTER TWO SURPRISE—WAITING TO TELL PRINCE CHARMING (14TH installment of Scruggs and Samantha by Mary de la Pena)

CHAPTER TWO
SURPRISE—WAITING TO TELL PRINCE CHARMING
(14TH installment of Scruggs and Samantha by Mary de la Pena)

When I returned to the law office, Prince Charming acted as if he barely recognized my existence. When I entered his office, he remained seated, not getting up to usher me inside as he usually did.  Worse yet, he immediately picked up the conversation in Spanish, expecting me to follow along.  Usually, as a courtesy to me, he gave me a cursory explanation in English for background information to make it easier for me to follow the Spanish conversation.
I caught the insult and filed it.  I hated being made to feel inferior, and when I struggled to understand the conversation it angered me.  I quietly took the affront but also added a few more bricks to my wall of discontent. 
I wanted him to know I had only stopped by the Pomona Valley Humane Society to do a “quick run-through” to look for a kitten.  I had never expected to find a dog that would capture my heart in such an urgent way.  I wanted to explain to my husband, friend, and law partner that I had found a dog that spoke to my broken heart.  Yet, I knew he was not in a place where he could hear me.  He was as walled off from me as I was from him.
So, long after the clients had left the office and we had closed the deal, long after I had finished the work on my desk, I kept silent about Scruggs.  I held the secret close to my heart, afraid to say anything, afraid I would say the wrong thing and risk my husband resenting my choice.  I needed desperately for him to want Scruggs as badly as I did.  I needed my husband to tell me I wasn’t crazy for wanting this dog.  I needed him to see the magic of the dog.  But, most of all, I needed reassurance that my Prince Charming could still see how deeply my soul was touched by the scruffy golden dog, my gift from God.  At that time, however, I was no longer certain he would understand my need.  Our bond was breaking, and our team was coming apart.  I no longer trusted him.
My father once said, “Marriage is like hitching two horses in a harness; you need to pick two horses that are similar in size, breed, and temperament. Otherwise, there will be problems with how they work in tandem.”  He said it was important to have two people with the same work ethic, the same intelligence level, a similar background, and the same attitude toward life.  Without that similarity, just like with working horses, there would be a tendency for the partners to pull in different directions. 
I also knew that for the last twenty years I was very fortunate to have had a relationship with my husband that was like that well-chosen team of horses; we worked well together, wanted the same things in life, had enormous respect for each other, and both of us pulled our weight without major complaint.  After all these years I knew when he needed a little slack in his harness and vice versa. We also felt the tensions and occasional heartbreak that was part of living and working closely with someone for more than two decades. In many respects, I believed we embodied the true reason why God created marriage.  He gave us this holy institution blessed Him, so we humans would always have a partner with whom to share the loads of life. 
But the exceptionally long period of unrest and sadness caused by the deaths of close friends, family and beloved pets, was dragging on the partnership.  My poor partner husband had been left too long to “pick up the slack in the harness.”  He had stopped trying to “fix it” and had taken to leaving me alone to find my own way out of my abyss.
So I waited.  I waited all that afternoon and well into Friday.  I knew the time was getting short because we were going to be gone all day Saturday, and Sunday the Humane Society was closed.  Monday was the last day the officials would hold Scruggs, and that afternoon they would surely carry out his sentence of death if someone did not save him.  That happy, loveable dog was to draw his last breath if a home was not found for him.

            Time was indeed short.

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